1. Accept it. 

This is probably our number one tip to help you cope with anxiety.  Many of the patients we see want strategies to ‘fight’ anxiety.  What we often tell people is to pause, take a breath and make room for the anxiety. This might sound counterintuitive, but the very act of allowing yourself to feel what you feel – without trying to get rid of it or feeling it is abnormal – can be a relief and healing in itself.  Accept anxiety. It is a natural part of life.  It occurs even in tiny ants, when posed with a perceived threat. We cannot be human and not feel anxiety. There are some specific skills in Acceptance and Commitment Therapy that might be useful to you.

2. Get out, even if only as far as your gate.

The cycle of anxiety re-inforces itself. The more you isolate yourself, the more comfortable it feels to stay at home. This becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy, where connecting with others or leaving the home becomes increasingly anxiety-provoking. The best way to cope with anxiety is to start with a tiny step that feels manageable to you. How about a walk in your own garden? How about a little walk down the street? How about challenging yourself to get into the car and drive to a friend’s house? Slowly you build your confidence and break the chains of anxiety.

3. Challenge the negative thoughts. 

We often take our thoughts at face-value. If I think it, it must be true.  This is a fallacy in itself.  Many of our thoughts are constructs of our negative experiences in the past, rather than actual truth.  So challenge these thoughts. Debate them, as if you were standing in court and had to argue for both sides. For instance, if you struggle to make that important phone call, how about just imagining it first, and writing down what the worst thing that might happen is? And then challenge that with the possible best outcomes.

4. Use play and humour. 

Anxiety feels very serious doesn’t it? One way of breaking its hold on you is by playing with it and laughing at it. Many of the best comedians can take dark subject matter and find humour in it. Often, this is a direct result of their own painful experiences in the past.  We are not all comics, but we are all born with a sense of play. Play and humour are vital in sustaining us as a species. You can even see play behaviour in the animal kingdom.  So play around with anxiety – talk back at it, imagine it as a cartoon character, laugh about it with a friend.  Laughter releases endorphins, which ameliorates anxiety.

5. See a good therapist 

Sometimes it is hard to overcome anxiety by yourself.  This is where seeing a trusted therapist might help. This may be a psychologist or psychiatrist. What is important is that you feel comfortable with them and can build trust with them.  Always be mindful of the therapist’s credentials and ensure they have experience and expertise.  A good therapist can help give you many more tips on how to cope with anxiety, as well as address other issues such as difficulties with self-esteem.